A Rhode Island private school sparked controversy by advising parents against allowing their children to bring Valentine’s Day cards to school if they depicted white individuals or promoted heterosexual relationships.

Moses Brown Lower School in Providence issued a note to parents, urging them to guide their children in selecting cards that don’t adhere to “gender normative” stereotypes, such as separate cards for boys and girls.

Head of the lower school, Osvaldo Jose Marti, emphasized the importance of representation, encouraging parents to steer clear of cards featuring only white characters to ensure students of color see themselves reflected in the cards they receive.

While some parents supported the school’s directive, praising it as an opportunity to teach inclusivity, others questioned the necessity of such restrictions on a holiday traditionally centered around friendship and fun.

The school emphasized fostering a spirit of friendship and discouraged romantic themes, particularly for older students, in line with their focus on inclusivity and diversity.

Here’s the email the school sent out below.

“As we approach the month of February, we are writing to share some guidelines for the selection and exchange of Valentines in the Lower School. If your child wishes to bring cards for classmates, please consider these recommendations, which we make in an effort to promote kindness and inclusivity within our community:

• If your child would like to bring cards for classmates (this is entirely optional), please bring a card for every other child in the pod or in the grade.
• Please coach your child if purchasing commercially produced cards to select something that does not feel ‘gender normative’ (with separate ‘boy cards’ vs. ‘girl cards,’ for instance.)
• Also, consider talking to your child about avoiding cards that portray only White human characters. Representation matters and our students of color also deserve to see themselves in some of the cards they receive, unless we can find cards without people pictured at all.
• Valentine’s Day celebration at the Lower School level should have a focus on friendship and fun. Please join us in trying to avoid the romantic crush themes that can dominate the day for older students.”

Thanks to ToddStarnes.com and WJAR in Rhode Island for contributing to this story.