“Hold onto your MAGA hats, folks! Kamala Harris is ‘ready’ to take the wheel”as if we weren’t already careening towards the edge of the political cliff!”

In an interview that could only be described as a desperate grab for the spotlight, Vice President Kamala Harris declared her readiness to assume the presidency amidst the growing doubts over Sleepy Joe Biden’s mental fitness. Ah, the sweet scent of political ambition!

Harris’s bold statement comes on the heels of Special Counsel Robert Hur’s damning report on Biden’s mishandling of classified material. The report revealed that good ol’ Joe “willfully retained and disclosed classified materials” but, lo and behold, no criminal charges were warranted.

But wait, there’s more! Biden’s memory seems to be as elusive as his coherent sentences these days. The report highlighted his inability to recall basic details about major events, including when he served as vice president under Obama and the exact year his son passed away ”“ a topic he frequently brings up in speeches. It’s like a tragic game of political hide-and-seek, and the American people are left to find the truth.

Unsurprisingly, this has sent top Democrats into a private frenzy, as a recent poll indicates that 86% of Americans believe Biden is too long in the tooth for another presidential run, with 76% expressing concerns about his mental fitness. It appears the sun is setting on Biden’s political career, and the party is scrambling to find a new star to hitch their wagon to.

Enter Kamala Harris, stage left! In an interview with The Wall Street Journal, Harris confidently asserted, “I am ready to serve. There’s no question about that.” She claimed that everyone who witnesses her in action “walks away fully aware of my capacity to lead.” Oh, Kamala, your confidence is as inspiring as it is delusional!

Jennifer Palmieri, a seasoned Democrat operative who worked for Obama, Clinton, and the ill-fated Hillary 2016 campaign, told the Journal that Hur’s report has thrust Harris into the spotlight sooner than expected. “There was always going to be a lot of scrutiny and pressure on her in the 2024 campaign, and that moment’s here now,” she said.

A recent Harvard CAPS / Harris poll found that if Biden decided to hang up his presidential spurs, Harris would be the top choice among Democrat voters at a whopping 15%. And, in a stunning display of her popularity, an NBC News poll from last year found that Harris had the lowest rating of any vice president in the history of the survey, with a -17 rating. It seems the Democrats are really scraping the bottom of the barrel this time around!

As Abraham Lincoln wisely said, “You can fool all the people some of the time, and some of the people all the time, but you cannot fool all the people all the time.” It appears the Democrats are trying their best to prove Honest Abe wrong. Good luck with that!

“A house divided against itself cannot stand.”

”“ Abraham Lincoln, June 16, 1858, during his acceptance speech for the Illinois Republican Party’s nomination as a U.S. Senate candidate.

Puppet’s Points:

• Kamala Harris is “ready” to take over the presidency ”“ must be why she’s polling at a staggering 15% among Democrat voters!
• Biden’s memory lapses are becoming more frequent than his gaffes ”“ and that’s saying something!
• The Democrats are in a panic over Biden’s electability, but they still can’t seem to find a candidate that resonates with the American people.